new year's ever 2010

dear doris
i've been relistening to emmy's tapes
the crone, sacred prostitute, you're so weird, why do we write

ON THE SACRED PROSTITUTE

thoroughly do not understand such a concept
if it's literal i would not want to have sex
with a lot of guys
i am not that compassionate with my body
i am not that understanding with my body
nor do i want to be.

sacred prostitute energy
however is another story
doesn't involve my body
would involve men and women
could extend myself
could involve myself

i couldn't do it all of the time
nor again would i want to
as a concept it is attainable
on a finite level.

SOURCE
TRUE SELF

the journey as everyone keeps calling this
little trip we are on
is to go back to the self
to become the self
as far as it is attainable in this lifetime
i am satisfied with that
each day is a trip
and it is fun.

i am on the last half of my journey
maybe i have 20 years
so each day i wake up
to make the most out of what i have.

i don't have to figure out too much what is in my wake
because god had already planned it for me
john is predominantly in my mind
and much of my time will be spent on him.

i don't feel upset about that at all
it's like the rest of my life is figured out
unless someone like the unknown chaos throws
something else into the mix
but that is okay too.
life is exciting
and i am riding a firecracker.
come on 2010